Basketball in a life lesson

I come from a small Mormon town called Magrath in sunny Southern Alberta.  From the time you can hold a ball you learn three things, how to dribble it, how to shoot it through a hoop and to fight for it if someone tries to take it from you.  That's right I'm talking about our staple game of basketball.  Not that baseball and softball and soccer aren't our thing too.  And of course hockey.

I had the opportunity to watch my daughter play basketball these past few months and they had a very intense game this morning in their tournament.  You could see the aggression and effort.  You could see their frustration with themselves when they made some mistakes, so adorable for the record by the way.  All the parents can really do is cheer them on.  We yell things out like defense or rebounds or hustle but what I really noticed is they just wanted fans in the stands supporting and encouraging them no matter what.  The laughs and smiles and team effort was commendable and it was nice to see them work so hard together along with self determination to win the game.

I've been playing basketball competitively since I was about 10 years old, grade 5.  There was a small handful of us that were allowed to play on the grade 6 team early because the coach saw natural talent and wanted to invite us to nurture and develop it.  I miss him terribly as a coach, as a teacher and as a member of the community, Mr Burns Alston.  He instilled a passion for the game in all of us that carried with us a long time.  His number one priority was your overall endurance, he and wife loved running so naturally he wanted us to become better at it and build up our endurance because let's face it you can't take a good shot or dribble the ball well if you're always winded.  I thank him for that lesson because it didn't just apply to ball it applied to life.

You can't always sit on the sidelines you have to get in the game, no one can force you, no one can do it for you.  You are the only one that can live your own life.  Waiting is contrary to the point of life.  Not that you shouldn't be patient for things but work hard to prepare yourself for them in the meantime.  Do everything you can so when your called into the game you know what your doing or should be doing and you'll be able to develop experience quickly and more efficiently.  Trials and challenges won't seem as hard if you are prepared to meet them.

Also, always and I mean always cheer each other on!  Always!  Just because you're taking a time out from something and see someone else excelling at it doesn't mean you become jealous or wroth or judgmental.  You encourage them, you cheer them on and be happy for their successes.  Love others no matter what.  In the end your relationship with yourself and your relationship with God will be the two most important things you will ever develop and experience in this lifetime and how you form them and treat them will greatly affect the outcome of your eternity.  It's really hard to live with yourself when you're angry or hold a grudge or put yourself down.  Find a way to be lifted, find what works for you and like I said just a few sentences ago always cheer each other on.

Spring Break and Family Time

I love it when we finally get a short break from our scheduled lives.  The chance to sleep in, the chance to be a little more spur of the moment.  It's great!  I guess I was a little disheartened this morning when I discovered my kids had already made all sorts of plans for our break.  This year we decided to stay home and have fun, a staycation as people are calling them.  I asked the kids weeks ago to think of some fun things to do, it doesn't matter what or how much and we'll have a family meeting about it and plan some of our staycation.

Ah, family meetings.  Usually our family meetings are mostly goofing off and talking about silly fun things or making fun of stuff people take way too seriously.  Not all of them are that way though sometimes we touch base on serious things that our children or ourselves ( my husband and I) are going through and those discussions are filled with love, and heart, and that feeling that we can pull ourselves and this sweet little family through anything.  We try to have these meetings at least 3 or 4 times a month, you know, find out what's going on with our kids without being too intrusive we like that they are finding their independence.  This way if there's anything serious going on that they were afraid to tell us we can, as a family, work together to uplift, encourage, and support each other.  Sometimes it's not something that any of us can really do anything about but we can support each other in the changes of our lives.  I actually love that aspect of our family.

Albeit slightly disappointed that we haven't really planned anything or that we are struggling to, I'm still happy to have the opportunity to spend what time we can together.  Two of our children are teenagers so I get it, friends city!  I encourage that, just hopefully that's not all they choose to do their parents wouldn't mind a day or two to spend with them.  Our daughter is a Junior and I guess it's really hitting us that next year she's a senior and then off to college to live her own life so we want what little time we have left of her in our home because it won't always be like this.  Precious, time is.

Speaking of which, we have a glorious opportunity this summer to travel to visit my Husband's family in Utah and celebrate his parents 50th Anniversary woohoo good on ya Mom and Dad that's fantastic!  Also we are headed up to Southern Alberta ( where I'm from ) to attend a family reunion on my Dad's side, I'm super excited about that.  There will be tons of people I don't recall at all that I get to re-meet ( if that's a thing), lots to introduce my kids and husband to, horses, carriage rides and my ultimate favorite thing....the Rocky Mountains.  Ahhh cannot wait just to see them and hike in them and smell the fresh mountain air.  I get to see me Mum and Dad and I'm excited to see how they react to our youngest daughter Catie.  I think the last time my Dad saw her she was about 2 years old and this girl is a firecracker, super smart, clever and also...bossy.  Did I mention I can't wait?!

On a different note, my son who is in the HS cross country team is going to start running with me.  I need to find a pace, and I'd like to see how long and how far I can get myself to go.  He's really good at running and needs to find his pace also so two birds one stone.  This unhealthy body isn't done yet and I'm gonna do the best I can with what I have as long as I can.  Aiming to lower my cholesterol, did you know that Diabetics have to have a lower cholesterol than normal?  Mine is in the low-normal range for a normal person but the normal-high range for a diabetic.  It sucketh!  Still, gonna keep trying, gotta keep going.  If all goes well my next doctor's visit will be awesomeness.

Self Improvement

New Year's resolutions.  Hate them!  Usually. * winks*  The past couple of years I've been in a health battle that I'm tired of not losing but certainly not winning either.  I thought I'd have reached more progress by now but that's probably because I have only been doing what I can which lately has been the bare minimum.  Had the opportunity to coordinate an event about healthy eating and getting into exercise with app helps and all.  Was a fantastic event, one I wish had been better attended as all of these things were so incredibly helpful.

There are some genious ideas out there concerning healthy eating and diet.  Stay away from trends and fast 'diets' when I say diet I mean a permanent change, fads are almost always a mistake.  It isn't easy changing you habits when you get used to a certain way.  I luckily grew up with parents that always made sure there was a garden and fresh vegetables at my fingertips.  Now they also have a few apple trees, I believe a nut tree or two, a greenhouse, a garden, and their raspberry bushes have taken off!  Makes it easy to eat healthier just having it conveniently around you.  So, that's been my first step.  Make sure that I concentrate more on fresh fruits and veggies being at the ready than snacky foods to snack on.  I'm more likely now to grab some salad, an apple, or yogurt for a snack than junk food.  Helps when you limit your snacky foods to the healthiest you can find that everyone will enjoy.  Corn chips and salsa are by far a better choice than potato chips and dip.  Whole grain round crackers with cheddar slices rather than buttery rounds with american cheese.  You'd be surprised how taking your favorite snack and creating a healthier alternative can make such a difference in your dress size but it does.

Being diabetic I already watch my carb intake ( carbs=sugar) so some of these lifestyle changes came because my body said it didn't want the crap anymore it only wants the good stuff.  Hopefully this never happens to you, give it the good stuff!  I also rarely get to eat chocolate, says the chocoholic, but I do get to have dark chocolate on occasion which I actually like better.  I don't know when it happens but somewhere in adulthood things start tasting too fatty and too sugary and sweet.  I can barely eat a store bought cake anymore I'd much rather bake homemade and have a thin layer of icing or no icing at all.  Tastes better to me.

I also participate on MYFITNESSPAL.  Wonderful tool this is!  It keeps track of your caloric intake, gives you notes as you enter your food such as good this food is high in protein or be careful this is high in fat.  Love it!  It also keeps track of my weight goal progression and my daily exercise.  When you add your friends you can all see how well you're progressing together.  It will automatically show your exercise to encourage each other to participate and keep going as well as showing that you made it under your calorie goals, hopefully.  But not too under, then you put yourself in starvation mode and end up storing fat every time you eat instead of your body recognizing you're always getting fed.  Six small meals a day does a body good and will actually help you lose weight.  Don't forget to drink at least 10-12 8oz glasses of water a day keep cleaning out those toxins and letting your body function to it's fullest abilities.

I have been working on being able to jog again for about 4-5 months now and can jog for longer periods of time.  I started working my way up to walking 3 miles in less than an hour ( 40 mins is what my avg turned out to be) and when I finally reached that goal so as not to harm my body and let it build up muscle I started the couch to 5k where you combine running and walking to work up to a nice jog.  Not there yet but I am so thankful that I started and I'll keep trying.  I have better days when I jog, my mind is sharper, my energy is higher and I'm just a lot more smiley. :)

I am still super ambitious and very hard on myself when I don't reach my goals when I think I should.  My body will progress and do what it needs to do the way it was created and I have to learn to be patient.  Results that happen overnight are temporary.  Results that happen over a slow progression last a lifetime.  Hang in there with me!

Always Learning

I love to learn.  Any question or single thought that enters my mind will and can take me on a wild journey of facts and opinions whether by the internet or books.  While I'm studying the one thought or question it almost always leads to another and another.  I can spend hours, even days on a single subject just to find meaning and understand it.

Some things no matter how much I research or how many materials I pour through, I am confused.  So many contrary opinions and ideas will lead me more to an inner debate that I can't win rather than a simple answer.  Leaving me feeling turmoil and chaos rather than some level of peace.  I could do without this feeling.  I guess with some things, you just never figure it out.

Relationships elude me.  I don't think I've ever been good at making new friends or even starting new relationships because I never know what to say or how to act.  I'm forever scared I'll say the wrong thing so some assume my silence is arrogance, well it's not.  Abraham Lincoln once said, " It is better to remain silent and thought of a fool than to speak and remove all doubt."  One of my favorite quotes lol.  I believe that friendship is earned not freely given and because of that I call very few friend.  It's actually a rarity and one who I call friend should always consider themselves in high regard to me as I don't throw that word around easily or without weight.

I've always been the type of person that if I call you friend I will give it my all.  I'll help any way I can, I'll be there whenever you need me, I'll even hang around in the background if you're not sure you really like me right now.  What hurts me most and causes me to be selective with my friends are those who can't seem to be kind about me when I'm not in the room.  Those who choose to assume instead of asking me outright ( be brave I don't bite), or even those who see my faults the faults I see as the worst of myself and not only choose not to help me overcome or improve them but rather judge me or point them out to others and use them against me.  A new pet peeve I've discovered are people who claim to know me and proceed to make up fantasies of things I've said or done.  Very puzzling.

Mom's usually always feel inadequate when it comes to their children.  Quite simply put we worry about them all the time and worry if we are making the right decisions to help shape them and mold them into active participants in our societies, communities and churches.  Not an easy task and some opt not to complicate themselves by adding children to their lives for this very reason, the responsibility of another human being.  As much as there are times that I wish I could just be the same person to everyone let's face it that's never going to happen.  Everyone perceives life in their own unique way so as a result even though I have a foundation that is the same to all three of my children, yes I treat them differently.  The foundations I speak of is the eternal love and reverence I have as their mother that will never change.  But even discipline is so unique to each individual.  What might work for one child just doesn't seem to fit in with another.  This is a hard relationship to work on for me, I wish they'd just all read my mind, understand what I need them to and be happy.  Ahhh such a nice dream isn't it?

I have learned over the years in marriage, after a fight, give yourself a few minutes to cry or breathe or whatever it is you need to do to find your patience with your spouse again and then apologize.   I am quick to apologize in quarrels for my responsibility in it whether that's raising my voice or even something harsh I might have said that I don't really believe to be true.  I do this without worrying if it's reciprocated.  I have to live with me for eternity and be able to look myself in the mirror each morning and know that I'm doing my very best in this world.  Just like others have to accept their faults and responsibilities for their parts in this world.  As a result of being quick to apologize I am also quick to forgive.  Trust of course is another issue that has to be earned and sometimes if abused enough never returned, but forgiving and not hanging it over their head again that I have learned to do.

Confidence really affects how we see ourselves and how we see others.  Having confidence in yourself and your abilities and talents is an important part of life.  Some may choose to be easily offended at the slightest things you do well, usually due to the fact that they can't.  That's a jealousy thing and not something you can control when others choose it.  I personally am happy for others when they achieve things they've worked hard on, or even marvel at their raw talent and abilities that I may not possess.  Why bring them down, we should be supportive and shine that light on them when they are doing something well.  If you find yourself withdrawing from people that are good at things you're not I guess that's your choice but if you would like to improve those things withdrawing would be a big mistake as they are right in front of you and can help you improve.  Don't compare yourself to them, simply do the best you can, you may never be as good as they are but you will still be better than when you started.  I'm always afraid to learn something new or even embarrassed when I have to relearn something I've already done well but forgotten.  Can't let that stop me if I find joy in those things now can I.

I don't claim in any respect to have it all figured out, nor do I believe I ever will, but I am trying.  That's all I have, I don't have perfection no one does, I have effort and love and commitment.  Committing myself to service for my family, church callings, and those in need who ask for it.  I will always keep trying no matter how high that hill is in front of me willing me to fall back down and give up.  I choose to keep learning and growing.   I choose to endure.

Lazy is a Sour Attitude

Unfortunately laziness is becoming a more acceptable attitude than hard work.  Bugs me.  I see kids who no longer fight for employment and employers who no longer bother hiring teenagers which makes it hard for those teens who actually are hard working to get a job and earn their keep.  Also bugs me.  Alot!  I see video games and television replacing books and imaginations and let's face it Hollywood is all about the writing.  If the script sucks it doesn't come to life but no one ever reminds the kids of this fact they all want to be famous actors not realizing that they are at the mercy of the writers in the first place.  Have to be in touch with your imagination to be a writer.  The challenge is to create new worlds that only exist in your mind not regurgitate what's already there.  Of course Hollywood themselves have gotten lazy now redoing movies more than creating new thoughts and ideas.

There is satisfaction in hard work.  Getting a project started is one thing, but when you complete it!  Best feeling in the world!  Interruptions and distractions are everywhere all the time and can make us excuse ourselves from completing tasks that are more important than our facebook accounts or our tweets.  Sometimes is just plain ok to turn the computer off, ignore the phone.  The world will be ok while you're busy.  I assure you it will still turn, it will still progress, it will move on.  The whole point of these technologies interestingly enough was for work.  Teams and team leaders that needed to be in constant contact with each other on various projects to get them all completed well and on time.  Even they are distracted by angry birds and candy crush apps showing a fall in production.  It's a choice isn't it.  A personal choice.  Not the phone companies fault, not the technologies fault.  We choose it.

The Godhead doesn't want me to be that way, I don't want my kids growing up that way.  He expects me to work hard, keep my home clean and organized, educate my children about the world in a safe environment.  I expect it of myself.  It's not always perfect, it doesn't always work out perfectly but we're not perfect so that's okay with me.  But we try, we work hard, we make a solid effort and we don't just give up if it doesn't work out the first time.

Having moved into a house that we didn't design or build you spend most of your time trying to make it yours.  You start with paint easier and cheaper.  Then you add furniture, odds and ends, personal touches.  Even then it's a constant project and big and expensive undertaking.  To be honest it makes me wonder why we bother with buying houses and mortgages rather that just renting and saving and building when we can then at least you start off with something you like the way you wanted it, but that's besides the point lol.  My oldest kids, when the microwave handle fell off, taped it back on lol.  They were gonna stretch that microwave for all it's worth understanding the value of the things around them.  When we talk about home improvement projects they get excited to help, now if only they were that excited about their day to day lives and keeping their rooms clean.  But when asked to complete a project as a family they are always on board.  In fact, and I love this, my kids get so mind numbingly bored of their electronics because they prefer hanging out with their friends and actually conversing with them, in person!  Face to face!  Albeit Just Dance is a favorite for them but at least they're moving which I like.

When they come home from school they have a determination to take care of their homework and chores right away.  They choose it.  Started out years ago as a rule when they were in elementary school and now that they're in high school they see the value in it and choose to continue that way.  To work hard on their education and help out around the house.  They aren't perfect everyone has their day where they just wanna sit around.  Even then, they play with their little sister, they tidy up when they see a need and they offer their assistance with whatever their parents are doing. I am so unbelievably grateful for that!  I rarely if ever have to get after them anymore they just understand the value of hard work at this point and recognize how it makes them feel to have a job well done.

When we leave this earth we only take with us our knowledge, what we've chosen to study and learn.  About the gospel, about the world around us, about ourselves.   In the end we rise only with what knowledge we've accumulated before our death.   Executing what you've learned, the hard work, is where you gain the experience.  We are here for the experience.   I prefer an enlightened mind to a lazy attitude myself.  Hopefully you feel the same way.

Just Sitting Here Thinkin'

I was so tired all day today, and nervous, and a little stressed.  Tired because....actually I'm not exactly sure.  You see Hubby has a very bad cold and has opted to vacate the bed to spare me his disease which I think is the SWEETEST thing.  However, last night he slept in the bed so I'm wondering if there was coughing or tossing and turning that might have made it impossible for me to deep sleep.

Nervous because I hate speaking in public.  We've gone over this in other posts, I always feel flustered and predict that I'll say the wrong the things.  I always want to run away after I speak, it's very strange I admit.  I feel like I'm going to be judged and criticized to the hilt when that's probably not the case at all.  All in my head right?

Stressed for my children.  I remember high school and high school exams.  No matter how much you think you know and how prepared you think you are you never seem to get the grade you expect on your finals.  Tonight I spent time with our daughter going over what she needs to be able to do and comprehend in American Lit.  I didn't mind it I actually quite enjoying teaching, albeit on a smaller scale.  I'll keep working on that public speaking thing.  It bugs me that I'm always so flustered.  Anywho, tried to go over proofs with our son for his geometry class.  I say tried because sometimes he gets defensive when you try and check up on him or offer him some help when you see he needs it.  I get it, fifteen years old, independent.  I just wish I had the magic words to 'soften' him up a little bit and accept the help or at least someone who is willing to help him study the things he's unsure of.  If not me at least someone.

Today instead of Christmas Caroling, which is something our family loves to do, we and our worn out selves all fell asleep and had nap time.  Can't say I minded.  It's like a preview to Christmas Break.  Still really looking forward to  the sleeping in, the lazy afternoons just spending time together, the food.  Working on planning the day before Christmas Eve thinking about seeing a movie with the whole family.  This will be 'MissToddlerPants' second movie in a theater.  It's so fun and exciting to see children experience new things like the movie theater.  They see all the people, the popcorn, the posters and videos playing in the hallways, the big screen.

I remember having a drive-in where I'm from.  Green Acres Drive-In I believe it was called there in Lethbridge, Alberta.  We used to pop a big brown paper grocery sized bag full of buttered popcorn and sneak it in along with a bottle of soda and some plastic cups.  I remember seeing a double feature once.  Grease 2 and Lady Hawk with Michelle Pfeiffer.  Loved them both and pretended with all my friends that we were the pink ladies that summer all summer long.  We dressed in whatever pink we had and wore bandanas in our hair sitting on each others swing sets and singing all the songs.  ESPECIALLY cool rider!  The best!  To this day still love both movies and I think I have seen every Michelle Pfieffer movie ever made.

This time of year makes you think about holiday traditions and childhood memories of Christmas.  I loved going to my Grandma Moen's in Camrose, Alberta for Christmas.  There was nothing like it.  My mom and her two sisters were very close to each other and very close to Grandma.  They were best friends.  You'd hear them laughing and talking for hours.  Hard not to be happy when you have lots of cousins to play with and happy parents.  We would all get so excited.  We all loved Christmas Eve, big turkey dinner, opening presents under the tree.  The Moen's are Norwegian and I love this family tradition.  Then we'd pout and whine and try to be sneaky when we thought Santa was coming.  Sometimes we would just creep up the stairs a little bit to spy on all our parents and see what they were up to, what they were taking about.  Maybe a surprise here and there we could catch wind of and ruin.  For the most part we'd just pass out and wake up as early as possible.  Trying to stay quiet in our mind blown excitement when we'd see our stockings filled with presents from Santa.  Shaking any new presents under the tree trying to guess.  Eventually we'd be exhausted from being up so early and waiting for our parents to wake up that we'd fall back to sleep.  I miss that.

Of couse St Louis has totally ruined me.  I went from Alberta beef to St Louis ribs, not that I'm complaining yum!  It's taken me a little while to get my own rub for the ribs right and how I like to cook them but I'm thinking move over turkey hello ribs this Christmas Eve!  No one ever said you can't create a new tradition now did they?  Will still do Swedish Meatballs, the hot crab dip, the cheese dip we make into a Christmas Tree on the platter, the hot chocolate.  We'll be adding another Moen tradition of Rosettes this year, the kids have only ever had them once and since I have inherited the Rosette irons I'm really looking forward to making them.  For those of you who don't know, Rosettes are a light pastry.  A batter you put on the iron and place the iron in hot oil to fry and then sprinkle icing sugar on top.  Dangerously delicious.

I guess I should be thinking about bed now even though that nap this afternoon messed me up.  I have 6 hours until I have to be up again and begin another busy week of hustle and bustle, getting this done and that done.  What are some of your traditions?

Love This Season

I have to admit, when I first walked into the Kohl's to do some pre Christmas shopping with my Mom I was annoyed that they had so much Christmas stuff up and Thanksgiving was still weeks ahead.  I like to explore one holiday at a time.  The Christmas music was playing and you could see some individuals with that look on their face.  The look of a real bargain.  Boredom even.  Like drones lined up for a deal.  As I walked along with my Mother looking at belts and ties and towels and aprons a Christmas song playing in the background I found myself automatically humming.  The more I hummed the more I smiled.  Then I saw the really cool center pieces for the Christmas Dinner table and felt myself light up with the Christmas Spirit.  Sparkling pretty decorations.  The anticipation of watching my kids open Grandma's presents on Christmas.  More Christmas music in the background lifting me higher.  By the time we got to the lines, drone faces I tell ya, I noticed a little boy crying in his Mother's arms about 2 years old.  Mom was trying hard to console and get him to stop but he refused.  That is until he saw my smile.

  I spent a good ten minutes with this little boy, he was in the line next to me and further on ahead.  We started making faces at each other and his smiles turned into giggles which of course made Mom turn around to see what was going on since he was much happier all of the sudden.  A woman behind me suddenly asked me about a purchase I was making, if I was turning all these items into a cool craft and could she get in on it but I bored her with a no just buying them as is but intrigued at her creative mind and started looking closer at my items.  I wish I could see what she was thinking.  Meanwhile as I was distracted this boy had began to cry again and be fussy and hearing him I drew my attention back to making faces and smiling at him again so his mother could complete her purchase.  It was almost as if we had an inside joke going and no one else could see this little world we had entered for a time.  Again, my heart started to glow.

Being the mother of two teens and pre schooler I feel as though I'm split into lots of little pieces going in different directions and it honestly wears me out.  Teenagers love their own lives but they also need a chef and taxi driver.  Not to mention an occasional tutor.  Meanwhile Miss Toddlerpants as we affectionately call her these days, is very demanding we have in fact hit the pre school diva phase.  It's not all bad sometimes very entertaining really but when I'm already tired from a poor health day and lots of 5am wake up calls there are, quite frankly some days where you just want to put them in a padded room filled with balloons for a couple of hours and read a book that's been sitting on your shelf since last Christmas and you're only goal was to read it before this Christmas.  Epic fail on that this year.  But when the Christmas lights go on, or Christmas music starts to play, their eyes light up especially miss diva's.  Her excitement is completely contagious and infectious.  You can't escape.

My favorite part of this season is, however, time.  I look forward to spending time with my family getting a little bit fatter, watching Christmas movies old and new, laughing together, playing board games together, eating cookies until we're on a major sugar high ( of course this year that won't be me).  Time is the most precious most valuable tool/gift that I have to give.  I do it as often as I possibly can whether it's accepted or not as long as it's offered.  I love the snuggles in front of a roaring fire all of us curled up.  The giggles and tickle fights.  The general silliness and smiles. 

In those moments, sometimes crazy funny and sometimes quiet and simple, I remember how thankful I am for my family.  How thankful I am for every smile, for every tear, for every trial and triumph that we have individually and collectively endured this past year.  I thank God in Heaven for the opportunity to be a Mother to these magnificent children.  Children that were always meant for me.  I think about Mary and how afraid she must have felt bringing the Savior of the world to life.  But how special, hopeful, peaceful and the joy she must have felt that night He was born to this world.  Knowing He was always meant to be hers.  How profound. How humbling.  

I am so incredibly thankful for this world.  It isn't perfect, as aren't we.  But it's ours.  It's ours to love and appreciate as well as everyone on it.  I am thankful for the Savior, Jesus Christ and His perfect example of love and generosity.  I am thankful to have the opportunity to get to know Him in this life through studying the scriptures and prayer.  I hope that we all in any circumstance can find a way to love each other, even in disagreement.  That we can learn to accept that everyone has free agency and the right to choose for themselves what to believe.  Merry Christmas, and God Bless.