Clearly everyone wants to fit in. But what is "fitting in" exactly? For some it's to be one of the 'cool kids' and I'm sorry to say this but there are adults out there decades out of high school that are still trying to 'fit in' with the 'cool kids'. Usually people who are socially accepted are there because they have created their own reality of what's right and wrong, hot or not and have found others who accepted their ideas and opinions as reality and in agreement make them the cat's meow.
For example, in light of the forthcoming election the candidates you see are no exception. They have their own ideas and opinions and present them to the country as their versions of reality. But who's is better? The media nudges that and of course truly helps keep the 'popular kid' up front and center feeding them to the nation saying this is socially acceptable you can trust this person. I'm not saying that either candidate is a liar or telling the perfect truth but I am saying that there are many ways to answer a question directed at you head on without letting on the whole truth leaving key things out that could offend or detour you from their primary objective. They want your vote. To get your vote they need to be the most accepted (popular) and share the majority of opinions in the nation. They need to be the rock star.
Throughout my own high school experience I was often puzzled at what the 'cool kids' thought was cool to begin with. Almost like a popular fairy tale and they were the characters. In reality no one person was more or less interesting than the next. You just believed in this fairy tale that certain individuals were not even worth the time, a waste of effort. I myself unfortunately looking back did the same to several individuals and for that I'm completely sorry. Even in college there were the acceptable kids that would look at me in shock and horror if I spoke with whomever I pleased and 'hung out' with certain individuals they would consider lowly. Never cared.
For some reason as an adult I find that the plight and horrors of high school drama have not completely left the minds of the adults they've raised. Too often even now and at this age, when I have experienced plenty of life to know better so I assume they should too, I see cliques formed. The 'elite' based on their own individual criteria of what's cool and what's acceptable. How to look, how to act, what to wear, how to do your makeup, what your house looks like, who has the better job, who has the most important calling at church. Pathetic really. It's childish games that prove no winner in the end. "...almost all men, as soon as they get a little authority, as they suppose,... will immediately begin to exercise unrighteous dominion."(D&C 129:31). Very worry some. I call it hiding from the reality.
The real world is hard it tosses you like the sea in a storm up against any jagged rock it can find, shredding your confidence and determination to continue on and filling you with fear. Ignore it. It's nothing more than a tool and if you learn how to use it, well then I guess, you learn. You grow. You create new ways to conquer it. You discover it's weaknesses and study it more heartily. You know the rules, they've been around for centuries. Using them to your advantage takes courage and sure footing. A solid foundation filled with trust and truths that cannot be displaced under any circumstances. Reality.
It is better for you to march to your own drum, do your own thing, find your own way, have the courage to be who you are. You don't have to break rules to be happy. Boundaries are not a trick or a burden but a necessity to your happiness continuing on. Fearing what others may say or do is no way to live. Having no opinion at all is far worse than sharing yours with others regardless of their labeling.
"The only way to escape the illusion of social acceptance is to make sure you're not a part of it. A person who is concerned only with the truth of reality, is the teenager at school who dress in any clothes he/she likes and forms his/her own opinion regardless what other people think. That person will promote leadership instead of decisions founded upon trends. That person will be a major threat to all people who follow social acceptance, because it takes a lot of courage today to be yourself, but once you reach that goal, a whole new world will open up before you. No more social pressure will keep you down. Instead, you will focus on what's important to your life and let the truth of reality guide you into a better, truly liberated tomorrow."
Read more: http://wiki.answers.com/Q/How_do_you_be_socially_accepted#ixzz28pjZTlqS
As an adult I have a responsibility to be a better example to my kids. To encourage them to find their own way in life but within reason. Presenting boundaries to them that they will understand completely once they have left our home to be out in the world on their own. Ones of protection, truth, and happiness. To teach them tolerance and patience with others around them who many have been misinformed by these socially accepted ideas that are causing harm to our society already and will continue to do so. I hope and pray that they can become strong, righteous participants of this world. One nation does not a world make but a tiny fraction of real existence. Hopefully I will have the opportunity to help them further educate themselves and be who they need to become. Hopefully I will make the same journey.
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